Sandy's Trauma and Beginning of Grief
Every One of us go Through Grief
OK, so I was on this journey – you can imagine. I loved the journey. And then, the next thing that happened was that tragedy in my life whereby my 3 daughters and their friend were murdered. I want to tell you about my journey of grief during this time. There may be some things there that can help. There are certainly some positive aspects that come out of it, so I’ll tell you about my journey of grief … and you know what? Every one of us here are going to have to go through grief.
Learning Through Adversity
Maybe many of us have already been through grief, and there’s going to be more. We’re all going to go through some adversity at some time. The key thing out of adversity and out of trauma is learning. What is there that you can learn from this event, because you know, those learning experiences are experiences for our soul and it’s the soul that needs the experience.
I’m so Glad I Spoke to my Girls That Night
So, Jenny and Kirsty, they were twins at 19 and Lexie, she was 16 – the next day. And the date was 23rd January 1987. They were living with their mum in the northern Sydney suburb of Pymble and a friend of theirs, Lisa was there as well, so there were 4 of them in the house. I was living about 5 kilometres away in Lindfield, married to Sandra and at that time we had a little 5 year old girl, Lara and a little 3 year old boy, Ian. At about 7 o’clock that Friday night I rang and spoke to Lexie and also spoke to Jenny and Kirsty and I tell you, the mirth and joy in that household was fantastic. They were all preparing to go camping for the Australia Day long weekend. And we taught them about camping, so I was really pleased about that. They were going to be joined by a group of friends to go camping. In retrospect I am so glad I was able to speak to the girls at that time, because at 10 past 9 that night Richard Madrell arrived at the door and professed his love for Jenny who of course had not had anything to do with him for 12 months and all of them wanted to keep him away with their mother even trying unsuccessful to take out an AVO on him. But he arrived at the door and shot her. He then shot Kirsty, then Lisa and then shot Lexie. All over in ten minutes.
My First Reaction
The police hammered on my door at about 2 o’clock in the morning and told me what had happened. My first reaction was that this was impossible … I mean I had only spoken to them several hours earlier. For me it was complete disbelief and I questioned about being shot with a shotgun as I knew something about guns from the army. I questioned the fact that it must have been impossible because with a shotgun you have to load it, fire and then re-load it, re-load it again …. Surely one or two of them are going to be able to get away. Surely not all 4 of them, not all 3 of my girls.
I Still Couldn’t Believe it.
On the way to their home in the police car I was still arguing with the police and I was asking if they had seen their bodies. “Oh, so you haven’t seen their bodies … you haven’t actually been there …. You’ve only been told about this over the radio … so you don’t really know this for sure.” Always thinking and hoping that it’s not true.
My Denial Phase
And then a little bit of doubt would come in and it would be like this: “God, how could you let this happen. No, no no, you haven’t let it happen. But …. If you have … what have the girls done? What have they done to deserve this for goodness sake? There is no God.” And so that’s where my denial phase started.
By Sandy MacGregor – http://www.selfimprovementdeals.com
See it on Video – 09 of 16 Sandy's Trauma and Beginning of Grief
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For more information, go to: www.iihs.org
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D Un-true Hollywood Story that Universal Studios didn’t want you to see. Deco Drive Producer, Ely Ferradas interviewed Will Ferrell during the Land of the Lost junket and
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My Thoughts Run Wild All The Time and I believe I have finally found the answer. I believe I have Adult Adhd. For as long as I can remember I have always had a hard time getting things done. I always needed to work on more then one thing at a time and when it is all said and done I never accomplished anything.
This has affected every area of my life and I cannot not deal with it no more. I know more then anything I need to take control of the situation and start doing some different things. My job has been affected by this, my finances have been affected and relationships have also been affected.
It is causing me great pain inside and I know now more then anything take control today. I don’t need to wait no longer. I always say tomorrow and you know what?, tomorrow never comes. What we have to tell ourselves is don’t put off tomorrow what you can do today.
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http://fitnessweightlosscenter.com - How to Warm Up and Cool Down | Pre Workout Exercises - In order to get the most out of your workouts and reduce the risk of injury it is essential to warm up before your workouts and cool down post workout. I see people at the gym get this one workout fundamental wrong all the time. Instead of doing some light cardio to get their blood
flowing and their muscles warmed up they immediately begin stretching.
You do not want to stretch cold muscles. A good analogy is a frozen candy bar - if you try to stretch it the bar just snaps, but take the same candy bar at or above room temperature and it becomes very pliable. The same holds true for your muscles. The optimal time to stretch is after your workout when your muscles are nice and warmed up not before our workout.
If you aren't at the gym or all the cardio machines are being used all you need to do is jumping jacks and/or a little running in place to get your muscles warmed up and ready for your workout.
Also resist the temptation to turn your warm up into a mini high intensity cardio session. You want a slow steady pace to your warm up and cool down routine.
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http://fitnessweightlosscenter.com - Stiff Leg Deadlifts | Leg Workouts - The is a super exercise for your hamstrings and lower back. As with all weight training exercise proper form/technique is essential for not only getting the most out of the exercise but also to avoid injury. As you lower the bar towards the floor make sure to keep your eyes/head up as this will
facilitate keeping your back straight. And as shown in the video do not bend you knees - remember you are targeting your hamstrings and lower back.
Because technique/form is so essential to the stiff leg deadlifts start off with a lower weight and concentrate on performing the exercise correctly. Do not sway as you lower the weight but try to keep slightly more than 50% of your weight on your heals. And as with all weight training exercises keep your movements slow and steady - again concentrate on form not reps. You will get more out of the exercise with proper form and fewer reps than more reps with incorrect form.
After you have performed the stiff leg deadlift with the correct technique successfully you can increase the weight. Don't make too large a jump in weight but move the weight up slowly. You should not be in a rush to max out the weight. I'll say it again proper form with fewer reps will yield greater results that incorrect form and more reps.
A word of caution - do not perform the stiff legged deadlift if you have lower back problems or are dealing with a lower back injury. And as with any weight training exercise if you begin to experience pain you should discontinue the exercise.
For more info drop by our YouTube channel http://www.youtube.com/user/FitnessWeightLossCtr or visit us on the web at
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